|
Post by onehandclapping on Apr 30, 2011 23:33:42 GMT -5
I'm wrestling with the concept of what I should or shouldn't be doing with my life career wise. There are obvious answers of "just worry about what you are doing this instant" and "watch and see what you do", etc. But if "I" don't feel like going to work right now, "I" lose my job. And my family would be very negatively affected by that happening. So where does one find motivation when there's none to be found? I have zero desire to do anything right now. And there is a battle everyday with "myself" over whether to go to work and keep up with this charade of "me going to work", or just to sit in silence til the mind noise stops. The truth be told, I have no problem with not having a job, or a house, or stuff. I'm very unattached to those kind of things. The idea of just floating around the country and/or world doing whatever I needed for sustenance seems very, very appealing. But my family would have some issues with that. Seeing as they are not the "travel the world with nothing but the clothes on your back" kind. So I guess the advice I seek is the aforementioned question of where does one find motivation when there's none to be found? I also want to add that I recognize what I truly am, or am not. But with the illusion of choice still prevalent in my experience of life and the draw towards "following" the choice to "do nothing" gaining momentum with every moment, how can one balance those kind of thoughts with the "responsibilities" of everyday life and the responsibilities of relationships with friends and family? Anyone got some "Real world" advice???
|
|
|
Post by waterdog on Apr 30, 2011 23:49:15 GMT -5
You said your motivation. It's your family I would work hard to get paid the best you can for now, then invest in getting a self-sustaining dwelling. Like Solar Panels, Capturing Rain water, Growing a Garden and stuff like that that I wouldn't mind to do, and the wife and kids can help! After your pretty well sustained and can start putting someback a bit, get some savings, etc. Look at some part time options and find something you don't mind or enjoy doing for 4 hours or so a day. That's what my goals are anyway. I don't have a wife and kids, so I can rough it a bit more.
|
|
|
Post by waterdog on Apr 30, 2011 23:58:49 GMT -5
What are you career options atm? What would be your Ideal job?
|
|
|
Post by enigma on Apr 30, 2011 23:59:59 GMT -5
The difficulty is in the belief that you are the doer. The doer requires motivation in order to do, and so the absence of motivation causes the imagined doer to block the spontaneous doing.
|
|
|
Post by dreamerrach on May 1, 2011 0:01:42 GMT -5
I still have lots of drive and motivation to do things--just not necessarily the things I have long had motivation to do . . . But I am in the same boat career-wise. And life-wise. It's like I have too many options and do not know which path to take! Sorry I can't offer any advice. Just commiseration
|
|
|
Post by onehandclapping on May 1, 2011 0:47:25 GMT -5
Enigma, And if the spontaneous doing "ruins" the imagined doer's imagined life? Then what is this imagined doer to do or not do? Especially when the imagined life includes other imagined doers who will imagine that this imagined doer is supposed to go to imagined work and make imaginary money to pay for said imaginary life?
|
|
|
Post by enigma on May 1, 2011 1:58:54 GMT -5
The idea that you are the one holding your life together is not only a heavy and unnecessary burden, following that idea is what causes your life to fall apart.
|
|
|
Post by sherry on May 1, 2011 5:38:21 GMT -5
...at one time I experienced considerable fear about allowing 'my search' to proceed. i thought that it would entail leaving my family and way of life... in fact, my apparent physical life has changed very little, but the internal one is very, very different....
.....perhaps not trying to make any decision, but just observing the fear and related thoughts without resistance might help move beyond it. our lives go on as they do all by themselves. taking such thoughts seriously and personally and resisting the 'what-if-outcomes' creates unhappiness.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on May 1, 2011 13:31:51 GMT -5
the real world will guide you. just allow it.
|
|
|
Post by onehandclapping on May 2, 2011 0:34:30 GMT -5
The idea that you are the one holding your life together is not only a heavy and unnecessary burden, following that idea is what causes your life to fall apart. How long did it take you to come to peace with it and let the "I" concept go? And did the ensuing "peace" stick, or did you have times where you "forgot" who you weren't again?
|
|
|
Post by onehandclapping on May 2, 2011 0:40:04 GMT -5
Was it a "shift" where, similar to "seeing" that one is the nothing for the first time, you couldn't "un-see it" once you saw it?
|
|
|
Post by enigma on May 2, 2011 1:44:29 GMT -5
Yeah, what is actually seen can't be unseen (or forgotten) because it's not knowledge. The "I concept" isn't even let go of as such, it's seen through. If it's simply not true, it's not a useful or desirable thing to hang onto. This 'seeing through' is what I've been suggesting for the search for happiness.
|
|
|
Post by unveilable on May 2, 2011 12:56:38 GMT -5
Im in a similar boat and it does not seem to be resolved yet. Some experiments I have conducted are...
1. Piercing through the apparent veil is my number one priority. I sincerely believe that this is for me, my loved ones and everyone I will ever interact with. Consequently, I tend to have a do whatever it takes mentality. Lately, this means experiencing the fear that revolves around work. I feel it in the body as much as I can without running away from it and try to recognize when Im running.
2. Sometimes I can actually transmute this suffering into peace ala Eckhart Tolle.
3. Per Adyashanti’s new book, I identify the individual fears that my thoughts can articulate. “Im afraid of getting fired, Im afraid of being homeless, Im afraid of disapproval”. A lot of things come up I thought resolved long ago.
4. Job or no job I’m going to drag around the same lousy brain so even more reason to observe what is happening now.
5. I make the occasional list of those things I precisely do not like about my job.
6. Can you transfer? I transferred out of a dysfunctional department to a different lousy job but at least it was something different and relieved me of some of the negativity in the environment.
7. At first there was no awareness of what I would really like to do. This is still vague but Im taking a leap of faith that it will become more evident.
8. I’ve been working on a savings account and have started looking for a part-time job instead. I can always add a second part time job to supplement my income down the road.
9. I want more off time for several reasons that I believe support my interest in piercing through the apparent veil. Spend more time in nature, physical fitness and volunteer work as a peer counselor. Spending time experimenting with these activites could give me ideas on what to do next.
10. Im open to the possibility of going to graduate school but this would create a large debt so not in a hurry to decide on this one.
11. Rupert Spira recommends that business decisions be made from a state of presence rather than a state of anxiousness. He then went on to say that making these decisions from the fear based egoic self would just create more egoic stuff. Not his exact words but the same idea...I aint no poet! I now try to examine this situation when Im in that state of peace. In that moment I can still confirm that the job is no longer useful and sometimes I even feel a greater calling.
12. Leave of absence? My company’s policy is unsatisfactory but maybe yours is better?
13. I sometimes wonder if I am going to wait until I get fired.
Two popular teachers that speak about this subject are Adyashanti and Eckhart Tolle. One of them (Adya I think) commented that we might see a lack of motivation because we are transitioning away from the common motivators of fear and anxiety. If I can find the youtube video, I will post here. Based on self observation I suspect this to be correct.
At least there is a whole bunch of other people going through the same thing!
|
|
|
Post by zenman on May 2, 2011 14:47:34 GMT -5
This is a good thread. I'm 41 and struggle with the career thing too. I never finished college, and don't have any wife/kids. I've had every low status job in the book. I've had a few financial windfalls and each time it happened I left my job at the time and waited for something else to come. I found my current career (av guy) during one of these times, right around the time the money was running out. It's not my passion though and I could walk away in a heart beat. It's almost like I'm waiting for some inspiration to show up before taking any kind of action. I write songs a bit, and think I'm pretty good, but I also have a lot of insecurities about it, and don't think I'm good enough to make a living at it, but maybe if put more energy into? I think it's the creative or spiritual types that struggle with this issue so much. We want our jobs to have a deeper meaning. I think most people accept that having a deeply meaningful job is rare so they just make the best of whatever career they're in.
I think people like Tolle and Adyashanti have careers that are so unique that it would be hard to take career advice from them. I'm guessing they're just like you and me, they wouldn't want some boring 40/week job and deal with bosses and irritating coworkers either. Tolle basically chose a park bench over working. I don't know much about Adya but he apparently just gives the occasional talk/retreat and publishes books/dvds. Sounds pretty cushy to me. These days I only value teachers that have regular jobs like the rest of us.
|
|
|
Post by souley on May 2, 2011 15:21:48 GMT -5
If you resent your current position, and still don't quit, it's probably based on a lot of fear. I quit my job after resenting it for quite a while. It was just when I actually quit I realized how much i identified with it and how scary it was to be "no one". I don't know if you need to support your family economically or if you're just scared they will be upset?
|
|