astarxy
Junior Member
Live and let live
Posts: 54
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Post by astarxy on Feb 1, 2011 11:58:33 GMT -5
you're all right who say i indeed have a kick out of it, obviously... you don't touch something that's not in interest to you. i do see it clearly now. i tried it today, live a day without her being a center point... it was better, in the end of the day i wasn't so exhausted. even though i still need at least one eye on my back, i plan not to pay that much attention to her... but most of all, i'm so very grateful i'm not in her position. the pain was worth it. thank you all ***
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Post by enigma on Feb 1, 2011 12:13:58 GMT -5
Sounds good. Maybe there's even a little compassion sneaking in there?
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astarxy
Junior Member
Live and let live
Posts: 54
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Post by astarxy on Feb 1, 2011 14:09:46 GMT -5
Sounds good. Maybe there's even a little compassion sneaking in there? compassion for...? i believe this train already took off... as said, we used to be closer, i got burned not once, not twice... i'm just a bit careful, but i'm not planning to share anything any more with her... you experience things and then move on... no use returning back. i feel like i can't go any other way than this my way that i'm on now... her life is her responsibility. time for her to get this already. ***
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mits
Junior Member
Posts: 92
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Post by mits on Feb 1, 2011 14:33:43 GMT -5
To be honest I tend to believe that the people that irritate us the most are in fact our greatest teachers...
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astarxy
Junior Member
Live and let live
Posts: 54
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Post by astarxy on Feb 1, 2011 14:56:20 GMT -5
To be honest I tend to believe that the people that irritate us the most are in fact our greatest teachers... true. but there's a difference between teaching/learning... and living a life for someone else... or being slave to someone. *
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Post by michaelsees on Feb 1, 2011 15:19:15 GMT -5
Sounds good. Maybe there's even a little compassion sneaking in there? compassion for...? i believe this train already took off... as said, we used to be closer, i got burned not once, not twice... i'm just a bit careful, but i'm not planning to share anything any more with her... I agree with Enigma 100% here. When you show compassion it's more for you than the other. Being compassionate does not mean becoming involved in her stuff or sharing anything about yourself. For me it's more like a hurt animal by my doorstep or a homeless person on a street. Neither of these stations call from you to share anything. They only require you to give something that can help. There need not be any emotional involvement. For the people I have helped in this world very very few did I have any emotional ties with. When I was living in Berkley Ca I would walk by almost everyday on University Ave and there was always this old man wearing a once nice overcoat and a old sort of Humphrey Bogart hat as you passed by he would lower his hat. I never missed a day when I walked passed him to give even when I had no job and only $120 for my life savings I would throw in a buck or 2. But never with emotional as a matter of fact a few steps passed after I gave him some$ I totaly forgot about him. So it's kind of like that I cannot tell you what to do but things will show up that you could do that you can also just walk pass and forget. Anyhow shred more than I thought Be well Michael
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astarxy
Junior Member
Live and let live
Posts: 54
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Post by astarxy on Feb 1, 2011 16:05:40 GMT -5
Hi Michael, welcome back... Thanks. Maby there's a connection between your story and mine, maby there isn't... depends on interpreting... anyhow, she and i already had a clean start, after a conversation, hugging afterwards, all this stuff... i know she meant it half honestly, which is a good percentage for her... but then in the office it's all different story... she does the bad stuff (to all) unconsciouslly. that's a fact, i see her. it's her natural response, survival kick. but... it's her life situation to deal with. how else will she learn something? i did gain from this experience. i've learned patience and humility. worth more than anything... the pain that torned me apart was worth it. know this one...? In the end, I've come to believe in something I call "The Physics of the Quest." A force in nature governed by laws as real as the laws of gravity. The rule of Quest Physics goes something like this: If you're brave enough to leave behind everything familiar and comforting, which can be anything from your house to bitter, old resentments, and set out on a truth-seeking journey, either externally or internally, and if you are truly willing to regard everything that happens to you on that journey as a clue and if you accept everyone you meet along the way as a teacher and if you are prepared, most of all, to face and forgive some very difficult realities about yourself, then the truth will not be withheld from you.
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Post by enigma on Feb 1, 2011 18:44:02 GMT -5
Sounds good. Maybe there's even a little compassion sneaking in there? compassion for...? i believe this train already took off... as said, we used to be closer, i got burned not once, not twice... i'm just a bit careful, but i'm not planning to share anything any more with her... you experience things and then move on... no use returning back. i feel like i can't go any other way than this my way that i'm on now... her life is her responsibility. time for her to get this already. *** Naw, I wasn't suggesting you fix her. ;D Negative behavior, seen for what it is, comes out of struggle and suffering. Understanding generally leads to compassion. You don't have to do anything about it. The thing is, folks are always doing the best they can, the only thing they CAN do given their conditioning. "There but for the grace of God go I."
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astarxy
Junior Member
Live and let live
Posts: 54
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Post by astarxy on Feb 2, 2011 11:08:44 GMT -5
Naw, I wasn't suggesting you fix her. ;D Negative behavior, seen for what it is, comes out of struggle and suffering. Understanding generally leads to compassion. You don't have to do anything about it. The thing is, folks are always doing the best they can, the only thing they CAN do given their conditioning. "There but for the grace of God go I." i hear you. you're right. she is in struggle, i can see her.. her life is one big hard work.. ego houses are made of matches... ... and i understand her... more and more. with a help from all of you. hugs for all, thank you so much!
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