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Post by siftingtothetruth on Nov 10, 2021 17:03:31 GMT -5
Continued from Verse Twenty-Five26. IF THE EGO IS, EVERYTHING ELSE ALSO IS. IF THE EGO IS NOT, NOTHING ELSE IS. INDEED, THE EGO IS ALL. THEREFORE THE ENQUIRY AS TO WHAT THIS EGO IS, IS THE ONLY WAY OF GIVING UP EVERYTHING. Commentary: Everything is a series of things. Things are objects with boundaries. Boundaries are always set in relation to an observer, the one who feels that “I am.” Thinking “I am” means thinking “I am not those things.” This “I am” thought is the ego. It is inevitably mixed with the belief that “I am the body and the mind” and various other things. In order to think “I am,” the ego has to implicitly create a sense of what it is, and what it is not. That sense is based on the idea that one is a doing, experiencing person. Only then can you cognize other things. You perceive them in relationship to this person that you think you are. So everything is only possible if there is an ego, a sense of separation, that then creates a world of names and forms. If that sense of separation falls, the boundary-based world cannot stand. All our language and concepts depend on the egoic distinction of an out there as opposed to an in here, on a not-me as opposed to a me. So the only way to really give up everything is to look this egoic illusion in the face. It cannot sustain itself, because the I which is observing everything is not actually that which it seems to be. It seems to be a solid core. It is quite clear that if one looks, though, that the observer is not a solid core. It has no boundaries. It isn’t an object. But if it isn’t an object, then it isn’t “in here,” and if it isn’t “in here,” then the things that are out there aren’t really out there, since they are only out there relative to something that is in here. Names and forms fall, concepts fall, language falls. Everything then is given up, in the sense that it is was never there to begin with. Inquiry into the ego means to turn attention continuously towards the I, that is, towards whatever is noticing experience. The cardinal rule of self-inquiry is that you cannot be what you are aware of; that in order to be aware of something, there has to be a distance between you and it. When one tries to do self-inquiry and find the I, one tends to land on another object of experience. This again cannot be you. Then you try to turn towards whatever is noticing that. On and on the inquiry goes this way, until it is seen that more and more of what you thought you were is actually a series of objects. This is then recognized as not you. Pursued to its end, everything is given up.At any time, see all the forty verses posts that I have published so far here. So how is the bolded different than neti-neti? Well, it depends on what you mean by neti neti. If by neti neti you mean simply thinking "I am not the body, not the mind, etc." -- that is merely a series of thoughts. What you need to do is to turn attention away from all thoughts, and thus towards the I (away from thought is always towards the I, and vice-versa). But as you turn attention towards the I, it recedes into the distance, and you must chase it. And as you chase it, and it turns into a series of objects, which, over and over, you must reject... you must continue to chase the sense by which you know yourself.
Finally that sense reveals itself not to be an object but a tunnel which opens into the glorious vista of what you are & always have been.
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Post by zazeniac on Nov 10, 2021 22:11:56 GMT -5
So how is the bolded different than neti-neti? Well, it depends on what you mean by neti neti. If by neti neti you mean simply thinking "I am not the body, not the mind, etc." -- that is merely a series of thoughts. What you need to do is to turn attention away from all thoughts, and thus towards the I (away from thought is always towards the I, and vice-versa). But as you turn attention towards the I, it recedes into the distance, and you must chase it. And as you chase it, and it turns into a series of objects, which, over and over, you must reject... you must continue to chase the sense by which you know yourself.
Finally that sense reveals itself not to be an object but a tunnel which opens into the glorious vista of what you are & always have been.
I thought neti-neti was rejecting what you are not because what you are is the knower of what ever object you think you are. You are not the body because "who" knows the body? You are not the mind because "who" knows the mind? You are not some sensation because "who" is experiencing that sensation? Etc. I know that "I" can never be an object because objects are experienced/known by a me, and therefore are not me. Yet here I am. Now that's a mystery. That there's a me that cannot be known in the manner that I normally know objects. But it doesn't stop me from being unkind to my fellow non-objects, to myself and it doesn't help me levitate. |
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Post by siftingtothetruth on Nov 10, 2021 23:56:40 GMT -5
Well, it depends on what you mean by neti neti. If by neti neti you mean simply thinking "I am not the body, not the mind, etc." -- that is merely a series of thoughts. What you need to do is to turn attention away from all thoughts, and thus towards the I (away from thought is always towards the I, and vice-versa). But as you turn attention towards the I, it recedes into the distance, and you must chase it. And as you chase it, and it turns into a series of objects, which, over and over, you must reject... you must continue to chase the sense by which you know yourself.
Finally that sense reveals itself not to be an object but a tunnel which opens into the glorious vista of what you are & always have been.
I thought neti-neti was rejecting what you are not because what you are is the knower of what ever object you think you are. You are not the body because "who" knows the body? You are not the mind because "who" knows the mind? You are not some sensation because "who" is experiencing that sensation? Etc. I know that "I" can never be an object because objects are experienced/known by a me, and therefore are not me. Yet here I am. Now that's a mystery. That there's a me that cannot be known in the manner that I normally know objects. But it doesn't stop me from being unkind to my fellow non-objects, to myself and it doesn't help me levitate. Yes. The point is that you can't stop at the mystery. You must keep pursuing the I, and keep rejecting whatever objects that come up as you do it, because here indeed you are, until the mystery is resolved. |
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Post by zazeniac on Nov 11, 2021 9:04:36 GMT -5
I thought neti-neti was rejecting what you are not because what you are is the knower of what ever object you think you are. You are not the body because "who" knows the body? You are not the mind because "who" knows the mind? You are not some sensation because "who" is experiencing that sensation? Etc. I know that "I" can never be an object because objects are experienced/known by a me, and therefore are not me. Yet here I am. Now that's a mystery. That there's a me that cannot be known in the manner that I normally know objects. But it doesn't stop me from being unkind to my fellow non-objects, to myself and it doesn't help me levitate. Yes. The point is that you can't stop at the mystery. You must keep pursuing the I, and keep rejecting whatever objects that come up as you do it, because here indeed you are, until the mystery is resolved. Well, this is why what you consider surrender is more attractive to this body/mind. This inquiry business is akin to sitting in a round room and being asked to find the corner. I already know, a priori, the room is round and I'll never find the corner. |
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Post by siftingtothetruth on Nov 11, 2021 11:59:25 GMT -5
Yes. The point is that you can't stop at the mystery. You must keep pursuing the I, and keep rejecting whatever objects that come up as you do it, because here indeed you are, until the mystery is resolved. Well, this is why what you consider surrender is more attractive to this body/mind. This inquiry business is akin to sitting in a round room and being asked to find the corner. I already know, a priori, the room is round and I'll never find the corner. Well, it's totally fair that surrender is more appealing. It is a complete path, no need to do anything else.
That said, the strange fact is that you do feel the corner in the room. So it must be there somehow, somewhere. And insistently following that feeling it can lead to that "other way of knowing."
One analogy I use with my students is that of a fish tank. Imagine you had your face pressed up against it, and had somehow forgotten that you were standing outside a fish tank.
Now, looking in the fish tank, suppose you were looking for yourself. You had the visuals of a fish, a rock, some plants, and the water. In each case you might ask: "Is this me?" And it would not be. But there is some common thread between your experiences of them.
That common thread is you... and in our analogy, it would be the feeling of your body outside the tank. That feeling is mixed in with all the visuals of fish, rocks, etc. It's mixed equally with every visual experience of the tank. As long as you look using your eyes, you will never find your body standing outside the tank. But you do have that body feeling, that common thread feeling, even if you don't know what it is. So if you concentrate on following it, you will eventually slowly exclude all the visuals and re-recognize that something beyond them remains... and it will lead you to the fact of having a body.
That body feeling is analogous, of course, to the I feeling.
In other words: self-inquiry is not futile. It leads you slowly to recognize that your current perspective is merely a perspective, and that there is another way.
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Post by siftingtothetruth on Nov 20, 2021 8:49:38 GMT -5
Continued from Verse Twenty-Six27. THE STATE OF NON-EMERGENCE OF 'I' IS THE STATE OF BEING THAT. WITHOUT QUESTING FOR THAT STATE OF THE NON-EMERGENCE OF 'I' AND ATTAINING IT, HOW CAN ONE ACCOMPLISH ONE'S OWN EXTINCTION, FROM WHICH THE 'I' DOES NOT REVIVE? WITHOUT THAT ATTAINMENT HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO ABIDE IN ONE'S TRUE STATE, WHERE ONE IS THAT? Commentary: The non-emergence of the (false, egoic) I is the Self, which is also known as “THAT” because it cannot be described. It is the indescribable beyond. Only when there is no I is there no other, and only when there is no other is there nothing to seek or to fear. This is the state of perfection. This state appears to be blocked because of the egoic identification with the body and mind. The identification is sustained by continuous frenzied labor towards the desires and fears that the body and mind desire. The non-emergence of the I is possible in temporary ways: in deep sleep, by controlling the breath, or by some other means of profound concentration in an activity. But the only permanent way is to seek the source of the I through self-inquiry (a continuous chasing of the I which seems to experience and do) or surrender (ignoring all thought except the thought of surrender, and relaxing). Then it vanishes and the one who thought themselves bound finds themselves having always been free. That is Self-abidance. This is the true state, meaning it is the state that in fact is always the case; there is only a misconception that it isn’t, and when that is inquired into, even that misconception is found not to have existed. At any time, see all the forty verses posts that I have published so far here. |
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Post by siftingtothetruth on Dec 5, 2021 0:36:03 GMT -5
Continued from Verse Twenty-Seven28. JUST AS A MAN WOULD DIVE IN ORDER TO GET SOMETHING THAT HAD FALLEN INTO THE WATER, SO ONE SHOULD DIVE INTO ONESELF, WITH A KEEN ONE-POINTED MIND, CONTROLLING SPEECH AND BREATH, AND FIND THE PLACE WHENCE THE 'I' ORIGINATES. Commentary: ”I” is a kind of illusion that depends on your not looking in its direction. You — or what seems to be you — believes yourself to be aware and independent, beliefs which cannot be sustained if you see the background from which what seems to be you arises. That background, and not you — in other words, not the “I“ — is what is aware and independent. Noticing that background fully, however, destroys the very ideas of background and foreground. The one who seeks to destroy the illusory I needs to move the attention away from all changeable objects and “inward” towards the one observing those objects. The “I” is what feels like what is noticing everything. It is the sense of being awake, alive, aware. When one turns the attention in pursuit of it with intense concentration, we can find from where that I originates — meaning, that when we look for the I, we find that it did not originate at all, that it is in fact not what we thought it was. It turns out that what seemed to be a separate I was in fact nothing but the Self, which is beyond separation. At any time, see all the forty verses posts that I have published so far here. |
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Post by siftingtothetruth on Dec 15, 2021 16:15:32 GMT -5
Continued from Verse Twenty-Eight29. THE ONLY ENQUIRY LEADING TO SELF-REALIZATION IS SEEKING THE SOURCE OF THE 'I' WITH IN-TURNED MIND AND WITHOUT UTTERING THE WORD 'I'. MEDITATION ON 'I AM NOT THIS; I AM THAT' MAY BE AN AID TO THE ENQUIRY BUT IT CANNOT BE THE ENQUIRY. Commentary: ”I” is a kind of illusion that depends on your not looking in its direction. You — or what seems to be you — believes yourself to be aware and independent, beliefs which cannot be sustained if you see the background from which what seems to be you arises. That “background,” and not you — in other words, not “I“ — is what is aware and independent. Noticing that background fully, however, destroys the very ideas of background and foreground. The one who seeks to destroy the illusory I needs to move the attention away from all changeable objects and “inward” towards the one observing those objects. The “I” is what feels like what is noticing everything. It is the sense of being awake, alive, aware. When one turns the attention in pursuit of it with intense concentration, we can find from where that I originates — meaning, that when we look for the I, we find that it did not originate at all, that it is in fact not what we thought it was. As we chase the I, we repeatedly find that when we think we have it, we actually have a thought or a feeling. So the intense concentration is a matter of consistent re-focusing in pursuit of the I. It is a chase or a hunt, until a point which cannot be predicted, when the runs through the obstacle course and into the vast vista of the Truth. This process of chasing the I is what is meant by self-inquiry. This is not the same as simply thinking that “I am not the body and the mind, and I am the Self, which is consciousness,” or any thoughts along those lines. Those are helpful, but they are merely intellectualizations. What is necessary is a continuous process of inner noticing that goes deeper and deeper in search of that sense by which you know you exist. These methods are as different as thinking “I can lift a 20-lb. weight” and actually lifting one, or thinking that a certain wine tastes good, and actually tasting it. At any time, see all the forty verses posts that I have published so far here. |
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Post by siftingtothetruth on Jan 5, 2022 16:38:14 GMT -5
Continued from Verse Twenty-Nine30. IF ONE ENQUIRES 'WHO AM I?' WITHIN THE MIND, THE INDIVIDUAL 'I' FALLS DOWN ABASHED AS SOON AS ONE REACHES THE HEART AND IMMEDIATELY REALITY MANIFESTS ITSELF SPONTANEOUSLY AS 'I-I'. ALTHOUGH IT REVEALS ITSELF AS 'I', IT IS NOT THE EGO BUT THE PERFECT BEING, THE ABSOLUTE SELF. Commentary: The I initially appears to be a kind of center point within you. When it is deeply inquired into by searching relentlessly for it and rejecting all objects of awareness in search of what is aware of them, then that which seemed like a center point (and this seeming center is the Heart) actually reveals itself to be a kind of tunnel or hole, an absence which actually reveals the otherwise-forgotten background. When that background is recognized fully, it is no longer background, but is simply Reality. This Self appears to be what feels like I, but when looked at closely it is not I (or not just I), but the I-I, which is the I without a sense of separation, without the thought that it is I, or at least without identification with that thought. At any time, see all the forty verses posts that I have published so far here. |
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Post by laughter on Jan 15, 2022 6:53:11 GMT -5
Continued from Verse Twenty-Nine30. IF ONE ENQUIRES 'WHO AM I?' WITHIN THE MIND, THE INDIVIDUAL 'I' FALLS DOWN ABASHED AS SOON AS ONE REACHES THE HEART AND IMMEDIATELY REALITY MANIFESTS ITSELF SPONTANEOUSLY AS 'I-I'. ALTHOUGH IT REVEALS ITSELF AS 'I', IT IS NOT THE EGO BUT THE PERFECT BEING, THE ABSOLUTE SELF. Commentary: The I initially appears to be a kind of center point within you. When it is deeply inquired into by searching relentlessly for it and rejecting all objects of awareness in search of what is aware of them, then that which seemed like a center point (and this seeming center is the Heart) actually reveals itself to be a kind of tunnel or hole, an absence which actually reveals the otherwise-forgotten background. When that background is recognized fully, it is no longer background, but is simply Reality. This Self appears to be what feels like I, but when looked at closely it is not I (or not just I), but the I-I, which is the I without a sense of separation, without the thought that it is I, or at least without identification with that thought. At any time, see all the forty verses posts that I have published so far here. Walking alone yesterday on streets around town. Just for exercise. Sometimes, the intention appears to clear the mind, to notice anything short of total mental silence. In that silence, attention is on the senses, as the way that ZD describes with ATA. Sometimes, as the 'maniac alluded to recently, I'll notice something new in familiar surroundings, something that was always there, but that I'd never noticed before. That actually happened this time, but it was prosaic. Nothing so cool as the luna-seeing. Perhaps more interesting than what I saw with my eyes in that moment, sometimes, patterns of mood, swirls of pre-thought become clear, and the dynamic of this mind comes into ever finer focus. So, a discovery of something new in familiar surroundings, something that was always there, but that I'd never noticed before .. but .. internal, not .. external. I'll often use a corner as a form of a dharma bell (another of ZD's ideas - not the corner, specifically, but an event, generally, as a "dharma bell"). In this way reaching the end of a block is always an opportunity to exit an inadvertently boarded train of thought. At one corner I noticed a guy walking his dog, coming from the opposite direction on the same side of the street. "ahhhh", the narrator interjected, "it is stimuli such as this that trigger focused thought  .. that is how you lose yourself". And sure enough, the number of thoughts that arose and passed through over the next few seconds would take a text wall to relate, all in rapid-fire succession. I didn't cross the street, just hugged the opposite end of the sidewalk as we passed. He had her on a short leash, and she was very excited, rearing up on her hind legs at the tension of it. Some sort of mid-sized short-haired mutt, perhaps with some hound, perhaps even pitt, young, but not a puppy. He was telling her "it's ok girl!, calm down!". But I could tell her excitement was positive as she strained the walker's hand. As we passed I vocalized ( externally  ) "hey puppy dog! .. who's a good girl?!? .. hi puppy!". The walker intoned "ok, say hello!", and I held out my hand for her to nose-up-to, all without breaking stride, or even making eye contact with the walker. No need for it! .. (from behind me, unseen, "ok, c'mon girl!") .. Cutting through all the nuanced analysis of the various layers of thought, mood, pre-thought and emotion that trailed in the aftermath, there was .. one .. true ... thought ... "IMPOSTER!" ... hmmm ... who is it that would slice through the cacophon(e)y, re-establish the silence so, and name this imposter, an imposter, after all?  As sifty might say .. "and not even that" ...  |
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Post by zendancer on Jan 15, 2022 8:31:25 GMT -5
First question today after waking up was Carol asking, "What do you tell people to do now?" I replied, "I tell them to experiment with different ways of going beyond the mind, find what resonates, and do whatever that is. It doesn't seem to matter whether it's ATA-T, staying with the sense of 'I', shikan taza, listening to universal sound, or contemplating existential questions. Niz summed it up when he said, 'The mind will wander around. All you can do is shift the focus of consciousness beyond the mind. After the mind becomes sufficiently silent, everything will happen on its own, without your involvement.'"
We then talked about how mysterious awakening from the consensus paradigm can be. On one end of the spectrum is Paul Morgan-Somers, who didn't even have a question. He was just kicking around a soccer ball at the age of 16 and....Boom! No searching at all. Ramana had one question at the age of 16, and ....Boom! Someone else may have a hundred questions, meditate for 40 years, seek like crazy, and no insights ever occur. THIS is unpredictable, to say the least.
It has now been 22 years since the "little guy in the head" suddenly vanished without a trace, and THIS was realized. No inside. No outside. No separation. No thingness. No twoness. Just ordinary life seamlessly unfolding however it unfolds.
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Post by inavalan on Jan 16, 2022 16:07:01 GMT -5
... Walking alone yesterday on streets around town. Just for exercise. Sometimes, the intention appears to clear the mind, to notice anything short of total mental silence. In that silence, attention is on the senses, as the way that ZD describes with ATA. Sometimes, as the 'maniac alluded to recently, I'll notice something new in familiar surroundings, something that was always there, but that I'd never noticed before. That actually happened this time, but it was prosaic. Nothing so cool as the luna-seeing. Perhaps more interesting than what I saw with my eyes in that moment, sometimes, patterns of mood, swirls of pre-thought become clear, and the dynamic of this mind comes into ever finer focus. So, a discovery of something new in familiar surroundings, something that was always there, but that I'd never noticed before .. but .. internal, not .. external. I'll often use a corner as a form of a dharma bell (another of ZD's ideas - not the corner, specifically, but an event, generally, as a "dharma bell"). In this way reaching the end of a block is always an opportunity to exit an inadvertently boarded train of thought. At one corner I noticed a guy walking his dog, coming from the opposite direction on the same side of the street. "ahhhh", the narrator interjected, "it is stimuli such as this that trigger focused thought .. that is how you lose yourself". And sure enough, the number of thoughts that arose and passed through over the next few seconds would take a text wall to relate, all in rapid-fire succession. I didn't cross the street, just hugged the opposite end of the sidewalk as we passed. He had her on a short leash, and she was very excited, rearing up on her hind legs at the tension of it. Some sort of mid-sized short-haired mutt, perhaps with some hound, perhaps even pitt, young, but not a puppy. He was telling her "it's ok girl!, calm down!". But I could tell her excitement was positive as she strained the walker's hand. As we passed I vocalized ( externally ) "hey puppy dog! .. who's a good girl?!? .. hi puppy!". The walker intoned "ok, say hello!", and I held out my hand for her to nose-up-to, all without breaking stride, or even making eye contact with the walker. No need for it! .. (from behind me, unseen, "ok, c'mon girl!") .. Cutting through all the nuanced analysis of the various layers of thought, mood, pre-thought and emotion that trailed in the aftermath, there was .. one .. true ... thought ... "IMPOSTER!" ... hmmm ... who is it that would slice through the cacophon(e)y, re-establish the silence so, and name this imposter, an imposter, after all? As sifty might say .. "and not even that" ... Yesterday I had a very similar experience. (I love dogs!) To me, my experience was in line with an insight I had that by realizing inner peacefulness and contentment, you achieve happiness and confidence in your conscious awake life, because your outward experience is always the reflection of your inner state. I think that almost everything we're educated to take as reference and effect, if turned upside-down brings us closer to the true nature of reality. Like matter / thought, reaction / creation, ...; surely, nothing / infinite too. |
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Post by laughter on Jan 17, 2022 7:11:29 GMT -5
... Walking alone yesterday on streets around town. Just for exercise. Sometimes, the intention appears to clear the mind, to notice anything short of total mental silence. In that silence, attention is on the senses, as the way that ZD describes with ATA. Sometimes, as the 'maniac alluded to recently, I'll notice something new in familiar surroundings, something that was always there, but that I'd never noticed before. That actually happened this time, but it was prosaic. Nothing so cool as the luna-seeing. Perhaps more interesting than what I saw with my eyes in that moment, sometimes, patterns of mood, swirls of pre-thought become clear, and the dynamic of this mind comes into ever finer focus. So, a discovery of something new in familiar surroundings, something that was always there, but that I'd never noticed before .. but .. internal, not .. external. I'll often use a corner as a form of a dharma bell (another of ZD's ideas - not the corner, specifically, but an event, generally, as a "dharma bell"). In this way reaching the end of a block is always an opportunity to exit an inadvertently boarded train of thought. At one corner I noticed a guy walking his dog, coming from the opposite direction on the same side of the street. "ahhhh", the narrator interjected, "it is stimuli such as this that trigger focused thought .. that is how you lose yourself". And sure enough, the number of thoughts that arose and passed through over the next few seconds would take a text wall to relate, all in rapid-fire succession. I didn't cross the street, just hugged the opposite end of the sidewalk as we passed. He had her on a short leash, and she was very excited, rearing up on her hind legs at the tension of it. Some sort of mid-sized short-haired mutt, perhaps with some hound, perhaps even pitt, young, but not a puppy. He was telling her "it's ok girl!, calm down!". But I could tell her excitement was positive as she strained the walker's hand. As we passed I vocalized ( externally ) "hey puppy dog! .. who's a good girl?!? .. hi puppy!". The walker intoned "ok, say hello!", and I held out my hand for her to nose-up-to, all without breaking stride, or even making eye contact with the walker. No need for it! .. (from behind me, unseen, "ok, c'mon girl!") .. Cutting through all the nuanced analysis of the various layers of thought, mood, pre-thought and emotion that trailed in the aftermath, there was .. one .. true ... thought ... "IMPOSTER!" ... hmmm ... who is it that would slice through the cacophon(e)y, re-establish the silence so, and name this imposter, an imposter, after all? As sifty might say .. "and not even that" ... Yesterday I had a very similar experience. (I love dogs!) To me, my experience was in line with an insight I had that by realizing inner peacefulness and contentment, you achieve happiness and confidence in your conscious awake life, because your outward experience is always the reflection of your inner state. I think that almost everything we're educated to take as reference and effect, if turned upside-down brings us closer to the true nature of reality. Like matter / thought, reaction / creation, ...; surely, nothing / infinite too. Thanks for taking the time to share that.  I think I can relate to what you're describing. I think there are many ways that we can describe situations like this. Andy likes the term "model". It seems to me that one model that might apply is reefs' LOA. Now, not to troll you, as I'm pretty sure I've read your opinions on the matter, but, I'd like to add that the source of that attractive inner-peace is beyond any thought about it, beyond any model of it. |
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Post by siftingtothetruth on Jan 17, 2022 14:28:52 GMT -5
Continued from Verse Twenty-Nine30. IF ONE ENQUIRES 'WHO AM I?' WITHIN THE MIND, THE INDIVIDUAL 'I' FALLS DOWN ABASHED AS SOON AS ONE REACHES THE HEART AND IMMEDIATELY REALITY MANIFESTS ITSELF SPONTANEOUSLY AS 'I-I'. ALTHOUGH IT REVEALS ITSELF AS 'I', IT IS NOT THE EGO BUT THE PERFECT BEING, THE ABSOLUTE SELF. Commentary: The I initially appears to be a kind of center point within you. When it is deeply inquired into by searching relentlessly for it and rejecting all objects of awareness in search of what is aware of them, then that which seemed like a center point (and this seeming center is the Heart) actually reveals itself to be a kind of tunnel or hole, an absence which actually reveals the otherwise-forgotten background. When that background is recognized fully, it is no longer background, but is simply Reality. This Self appears to be what feels like I, but when looked at closely it is not I (or not just I), but the I-I, which is the I without a sense of separation, without the thought that it is I, or at least without identification with that thought. At any time, see all the forty verses posts that I have published so far here. Walking alone yesterday on streets around town. Just for exercise. Sometimes, the intention appears to clear the mind, to notice anything short of total mental silence. In that silence, attention is on the senses, as the way that ZD describes with ATA. Sometimes, as the 'maniac alluded to recently, I'll notice something new in familiar surroundings, something that was always there, but that I'd never noticed before. That actually happened this time, but it was prosaic. Nothing so cool as the luna-seeing. Perhaps more interesting than what I saw with my eyes in that moment, sometimes, patterns of mood, swirls of pre-thought become clear, and the dynamic of this mind comes into ever finer focus. So, a discovery of something new in familiar surroundings, something that was always there, but that I'd never noticed before .. but .. internal, not .. external. I'll often use a corner as a form of a dharma bell (another of ZD's ideas - not the corner, specifically, but an event, generally, as a "dharma bell"). In this way reaching the end of a block is always an opportunity to exit an inadvertently boarded train of thought. At one corner I noticed a guy walking his dog, coming from the opposite direction on the same side of the street. "ahhhh", the narrator interjected, "it is stimuli such as this that trigger focused thought .. that is how you lose yourself". And sure enough, the number of thoughts that arose and passed through over the next few seconds would take a text wall to relate, all in rapid-fire succession. I didn't cross the street, just hugged the opposite end of the sidewalk as we passed. He had her on a short leash, and she was very excited, rearing up on her hind legs at the tension of it. Some sort of mid-sized short-haired mutt, perhaps with some hound, perhaps even pitt, young, but not a puppy. He was telling her "it's ok girl!, calm down!". But I could tell her excitement was positive as she strained the walker's hand. As we passed I vocalized ( externally ) "hey puppy dog! .. who's a good girl?!? .. hi puppy!". The walker intoned "ok, say hello!", and I held out my hand for her to nose-up-to, all without breaking stride, or even making eye contact with the walker. No need for it! .. (from behind me, unseen, "ok, c'mon girl!") .. Cutting through all the nuanced analysis of the various layers of thought, mood, pre-thought and emotion that trailed in the aftermath, there was .. one .. true ... thought ... "IMPOSTER!" ... hmmm ... who is it that would slice through the cacophon(e)y, re-establish the silence so, and name this imposter, an imposter, after all? As sifty might say .. "and not even that" ...  Evocative. I feel like this needs to be a novel with a dangerous chain-smoking woman, an exotic bit of avian statuary, trenchcoats, fedoras, and way too much late-night bourbon. A battered sign over a run-down door reads "Laughter, PI." |
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Post by inavalan on Jan 17, 2022 15:53:07 GMT -5
Yesterday I had a very similar experience. (I love dogs!) To me, my experience was in line with an insight I had that by realizing inner peacefulness and contentment, you achieve happiness and confidence in your conscious awake life, because your outward experience is always the reflection of your inner state. I think that almost everything we're educated to take as reference and effect, if turned upside-down brings us closer to the true nature of reality. Like matter / thought, reaction / creation, ...; surely, nothing / infinite too. Thanks for taking the time to share that. I think I can relate to what you're describing. I think there are many ways that we can describe situations like this. Andy likes the term "model". It seems to me that one model that might apply is reefs' LOA. Now, not to troll you, as I'm pretty sure I've read your opinions on the matter, but, I'd like to add that the source of that attractive inner-peace is beyond any thought about it, beyond any model of it. a little more what I meant by addressing the inner instead of the outer, because the outer reflects / results from the inner ... Until about 20 years ago, after getting at a pre-school age hepatitis, and having to diet and not to physically overexert for about a year, I always fought being to some degree overweight. I tried all kind of diets and gimmicks (including ear acupressure) with little success. When I reached almost 300 lbs my wife got worried and pressed me to seek medical advice. The tests showed that I was reasonably healthy, but I had high blood pressure and high cholesterol, so they put me on medication. I consulted a nutritionist too, who didn't give me any useful advice. Serendipitously, about a month after taking those steps, I found on line John Walker's (founder of Autodesk Inc.) story about how he found out what causes weight gain, how to control it, and about his success with that. Having an engineering formation I related to it easily. Exactly during that period, while browsing through the books at a Costco warehouse, I discovered Jorge Cruise's book "8 Minutes in the Morning", which pretty much confirmed what I understood from John Walker, and which also offered a clearer "program" of exercise, diet and lifestyle changes. You need to intake less calories, and expend more, while building up your health. In 13 months I dropped to my normal weight of 165 lb. After only a few months from starting my version of Cruise's program ,as I customized it for myself, I was taken off both the blood pressure and the cholesterol medicines, and my doctor was so amazed by my results that she even asked me to write down what I did, so she can share it with other patients. At work, they asked me to write a piece for the company's website. Many colleagues and acquaintances asked for details about how they could replicate my success. It is true that after 20 years, there is not even one person I know of that followed what I recommended. Not even my wife who now fights with some overweight. I kept my normal weight for over 20 years. But, my point is that early in this process I realized that actually I was looking at the being overweight the wrong way. It wasn't that I have to loose weight to be healthy, but I have to be healthy and the weigh loss, and the normal weight, will be the result of that. This is what I meant by addressing the inner instead of the outer, because the outer reflects / results from the inner. It is like wanting to have money to be secure, free, happy, help others, whatever ... You have to focus on the end result and not, in this case, on the money. They might / will come if needed to achieve those results. If you focus on the weight-loss, on the money, on the outer, you most likely won't achieve the end result you hoped for even if you achieved the weight-loss, the money, the outer. |
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.. that is how you lose yourself". And sure enough, the number of thoughts that arose and passed through over the next few seconds would take a text wall to relate, all in rapid-fire succession. 
) "hey puppy dog! .. who's a good girl?!? .. hi puppy!". The walker intoned "ok, say hello!", and I held out my hand for her to nose-up-to, all without breaking stride, or even making eye contact with the walker. No need for it! 
I think I can relate to what you're describing. I think there are many ways that we can describe situations like this. Andy likes the term "model". It seems to me that one model that might apply is reefs' LOA.
Evocative. I feel like this needs to be a novel with a dangerous chain-smoking woman, an exotic bit of avian statuary, trenchcoats, fedoras, and way too much late-night bourbon. A battered sign over a run-down door reads "Laughter, PI."