Post by Deleted on Mar 23, 2017 13:12:00 GMT -5
Some of you may remember me from a couple of years back.
I have no wish to engage in discussions of 'it', 'enlightenment', 'Truth Realisation', 'Self Realisation' and so on. I see very clearly that these are non existent, a fairytale, and anyone who states otherwise - is deluding themselves and others.
Enlightenment is only about one thing, and one thing only: Clarity of vision where the light of Conscious Awareness leaves no unseen cobwebs in the dark corners of inner and outer universe. Nothing can be known, but the Knowing is available to absolutely anyone. The true state of seeing things as they are is not subject to permanent bliss or fuzzy warm feeling. Those who have stepped into that space - will manifest their natural tendencies without restraint and in some cases - without decency. This is what G. Krishnamurti called 'the natural state'.
In line with the above I have attempted to uncover the real 'Jed' beyond the books. I had no interest in knowing the name, only what/who the person behind the most lucid books was AT CORE. The Realness of him, his natural state, without a mask. Below is one of my last e-mails to Jed. It is self explanatory, the details and the precise facts are of no importance. Living here in SE Asia was an eye opener, something that a Western person will rarely encounter, as the thin superficial veil of civilisation' protects the innocent ignorance of the masses and keeps them in the dark as to their own nature and how it manifests in the creation of the world as we see now. It protects humans from - themselves. I see clearly the reasons for Jed's choices, and some are of an unpalatable to me nature. I have reasons to believe there is more.
When Jed said 'All is Lie', he absolutely meant it, the only thing he himself knows to be true. Unfortunately, humans do not read between the lines and do not connect the dots. I have done so, due to my highly analytical Mind, due to inquisitive nature which abhores being a lie to the best of my personal circumstance, due to sharing the same environment as Jed and so understanding its realities, and the dumb luck which is manifestation of my natural Flow.
I am placing it here, because as I said in the e-mail the question is bigger than what I can digest on my own. I guess the only question is: what does it mean to be human?
........................
"I am trying hard to adapt a different perspective. Trying to find excuses, ANY kind of excuse. I could say it was just a dance at a girlie bar, I am beginning to understand their workings.... or that there is a girl back in SHV, you just came to PP on business.... or that you went there with only one intent - to listen to the band... But I can call a spade many things: entertainment, a game, role playing - it still remains a spade. The girl was less than half your age, with your hand on her ass.
You went back to the playground clutching the carte blanche.
I sound excrutiatingly negative, because the nature of what has transpired IS the f*cked up Reality of just what it really means to be a human for the majority... Higher state of Consciousness is BEYOND mere Awareness. To be aware of own mortal movements around the playground and to choose not to partake in the said mortal movements - are two different states. I didn't go fully Ramana. I chose to stay, but with limitations placed on me by my Consciousness which just bloody refuses to play the Game. You see.... I am not my Consciousness and not my Awareness. It is beyond those two.
Why can I accept the guys' stories here without flinching and yet feel hollowed out now, looking at you without a mask? Have I set the bar too high for you? But this was only because your books... the BOOKS set the bar high. They are unprecedented pieces of writing, do you hear me? I haven't touched them in three and a half years, after the first read. Now and then I come across passages online, and there isn't a single word in them to which I could say 'no'. ALL of it is complete, finished, all of it is 'yes', despite the progression further in both you and myself. They stand absolutety unblemished. Your Mind has produced them... and then.. all this. I'd absolutely welcomed an average Joe state of being, remember I asked you for NORMALITY once. But this... not every average Joe has it within him to cuddle a girl young enough to be his grandaughter.
All my life I have been so darn good at accepting, at moving on, at forgiving.. cheating 'friends', drinking 'ex', raping peeps, I let go, for they know not what they do... . But they were those 'average joes', and don't get me wrong - we all are, in one way or another. Each contains a spark, together with the divinity extinguisher, ready to vaporise any noble inner movement in the name of survival. But you said this: "I like happiness as much as the next guy, but it’s not happiness that sends one in search of truth. It’s rabid, feverish, clawing madness to stop being a lie, regardless of price, come heaven or hell."
I want to ask you... Have you ever stopped being a lie? Because that's how it started, a drive to stop being a lie, right? What now? This.. what is left of you... is that the truth of you? This question is bigger than what I can digest on my own. This feels just bigger somehow... it feels like... your books are bigger than you.
But your Mind produced them... How can such a highly aware man, with the most alert clever eyes - be thrown at the mercy of the feeble human body? The 'yes' or 'no' answer doesn't matter.. what mattered to me is that you could have the courage to be open.
I have flopped big time... the biggest do far. I want to punish you for being a lie, but at the same time - I can't. Because it's you, a vulnerable crazy mindless clever fool, the Big Pretender whom I am unable to shake out of his pretend boots.
And I am a village idiot.
"They’re looking at the outer Jed McKenna and assuming an inner Jed McKenna. I’m inside Jed McKenna looking out and I can’t really remember what he’s supposed to do or say. It’s all fakery. I’m an actor playing a role for which I feel no connection"
That's why."
I have no wish to engage in discussions of 'it', 'enlightenment', 'Truth Realisation', 'Self Realisation' and so on. I see very clearly that these are non existent, a fairytale, and anyone who states otherwise - is deluding themselves and others.
Enlightenment is only about one thing, and one thing only: Clarity of vision where the light of Conscious Awareness leaves no unseen cobwebs in the dark corners of inner and outer universe. Nothing can be known, but the Knowing is available to absolutely anyone. The true state of seeing things as they are is not subject to permanent bliss or fuzzy warm feeling. Those who have stepped into that space - will manifest their natural tendencies without restraint and in some cases - without decency. This is what G. Krishnamurti called 'the natural state'.
In line with the above I have attempted to uncover the real 'Jed' beyond the books. I had no interest in knowing the name, only what/who the person behind the most lucid books was AT CORE. The Realness of him, his natural state, without a mask. Below is one of my last e-mails to Jed. It is self explanatory, the details and the precise facts are of no importance. Living here in SE Asia was an eye opener, something that a Western person will rarely encounter, as the thin superficial veil of civilisation' protects the innocent ignorance of the masses and keeps them in the dark as to their own nature and how it manifests in the creation of the world as we see now. It protects humans from - themselves. I see clearly the reasons for Jed's choices, and some are of an unpalatable to me nature. I have reasons to believe there is more.
When Jed said 'All is Lie', he absolutely meant it, the only thing he himself knows to be true. Unfortunately, humans do not read between the lines and do not connect the dots. I have done so, due to my highly analytical Mind, due to inquisitive nature which abhores being a lie to the best of my personal circumstance, due to sharing the same environment as Jed and so understanding its realities, and the dumb luck which is manifestation of my natural Flow.
I am placing it here, because as I said in the e-mail the question is bigger than what I can digest on my own. I guess the only question is: what does it mean to be human?
........................
"I am trying hard to adapt a different perspective. Trying to find excuses, ANY kind of excuse. I could say it was just a dance at a girlie bar, I am beginning to understand their workings.... or that there is a girl back in SHV, you just came to PP on business.... or that you went there with only one intent - to listen to the band... But I can call a spade many things: entertainment, a game, role playing - it still remains a spade. The girl was less than half your age, with your hand on her ass.
You went back to the playground clutching the carte blanche.
I sound excrutiatingly negative, because the nature of what has transpired IS the f*cked up Reality of just what it really means to be a human for the majority... Higher state of Consciousness is BEYOND mere Awareness. To be aware of own mortal movements around the playground and to choose not to partake in the said mortal movements - are two different states. I didn't go fully Ramana. I chose to stay, but with limitations placed on me by my Consciousness which just bloody refuses to play the Game. You see.... I am not my Consciousness and not my Awareness. It is beyond those two.
Why can I accept the guys' stories here without flinching and yet feel hollowed out now, looking at you without a mask? Have I set the bar too high for you? But this was only because your books... the BOOKS set the bar high. They are unprecedented pieces of writing, do you hear me? I haven't touched them in three and a half years, after the first read. Now and then I come across passages online, and there isn't a single word in them to which I could say 'no'. ALL of it is complete, finished, all of it is 'yes', despite the progression further in both you and myself. They stand absolutety unblemished. Your Mind has produced them... and then.. all this. I'd absolutely welcomed an average Joe state of being, remember I asked you for NORMALITY once. But this... not every average Joe has it within him to cuddle a girl young enough to be his grandaughter.
All my life I have been so darn good at accepting, at moving on, at forgiving.. cheating 'friends', drinking 'ex', raping peeps, I let go, for they know not what they do... . But they were those 'average joes', and don't get me wrong - we all are, in one way or another. Each contains a spark, together with the divinity extinguisher, ready to vaporise any noble inner movement in the name of survival. But you said this: "I like happiness as much as the next guy, but it’s not happiness that sends one in search of truth. It’s rabid, feverish, clawing madness to stop being a lie, regardless of price, come heaven or hell."
I want to ask you... Have you ever stopped being a lie? Because that's how it started, a drive to stop being a lie, right? What now? This.. what is left of you... is that the truth of you? This question is bigger than what I can digest on my own. This feels just bigger somehow... it feels like... your books are bigger than you.
But your Mind produced them... How can such a highly aware man, with the most alert clever eyes - be thrown at the mercy of the feeble human body? The 'yes' or 'no' answer doesn't matter.. what mattered to me is that you could have the courage to be open.
I have flopped big time... the biggest do far. I want to punish you for being a lie, but at the same time - I can't. Because it's you, a vulnerable crazy mindless clever fool, the Big Pretender whom I am unable to shake out of his pretend boots.
And I am a village idiot.
"They’re looking at the outer Jed McKenna and assuming an inner Jed McKenna. I’m inside Jed McKenna looking out and I can’t really remember what he’s supposed to do or say. It’s all fakery. I’m an actor playing a role for which I feel no connection"
That's why."
