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Post by klaus on Feb 9, 2011 15:19:40 GMT -5
homealone,
Are you right for her?
As ZD says, listen to the voice within.
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Post by therealfake on Feb 9, 2011 16:46:53 GMT -5
Thank you all for your answers. I am trying to let them speak to me but some confusion still remains.
I guess I feel like there should be a spark and urge to be with someone but there isn't in our relationship--although I do love her. Is it just me projecting what a relationship should be and I should just be happy with the way things are? Dr. Wayne Dyer says that you should be with the one that challenges you the most and thus helps you to see what your state of mind is. I am constantly being challenged with my girlfriend--trying to stay calm as she speaks negatively about most things everyday and gets easily upset over trivial things (like losing at video games/road rage).
Let me please try to restate my initial question hopefully for clarity:I am wondering if an enlightened person decides who to marry? I know that the right one will come to you and there is no need to search but what if you are with someone whom you aren't sure is right for you?I've had many failed relationships and many I am glad to have not married. I have been with my girlfriend for 2 1/2 years now and we are at odds often and don't seem to have much in common. We disagree on spirituality, seeking happiness and many other subjects so I often wonder if she is right for me. Then I realize that this is just my ego talking and that I should just be and accept her as she is. So this is where my question comes in. If one is, enlightened pure love, and accepts everyone totally does that mean that just anyone will do because all should be accepted? Then why would you make any decision or choice? Is deciding if there is a connection a judgment call and therefore not acceptance for what is? And if "wanting" love is being out of touch with our spirit then why do we marry? I know I don't need anyone/anything to be happy so is wanting a spark a desire that comes from the spirit wanting a stronger connection or is it ego trying to fill a hole of what it thinks it lacks? Am I still missing the point? Thank You, Thank You, Thank You! Your asking the wrong peeps here. Sit quietly and ask your questions to the infinite stillness that you are. Don't expect an immediate answer, just ask your questions to your being and then wait. You'll know what to do soon enough...
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mits
Junior Member
Posts: 92
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Post by mits on Feb 9, 2011 17:13:27 GMT -5
I have found that when I am facing a big decision it is wise to honestly look within and ask yourself a simple question such as "is this person right for me?" and surely enough your inner tuition will tell you like it is.
By the way zendancer are there any tips on how one could learn to listen to the small-still voice within. I have repeatedly tried to listen but all I hear is body sensations and energy flows deepening and moving....maybe I am just getting tired.
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jenpa
Junior Member
Posts: 79
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Post by jenpa on Feb 9, 2011 17:19:59 GMT -5
Homealone: Here is a wonderful Tolle quote that may apply to your question:
"If you find your here and now intolerable and it makes you unhappy, you have three options: remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally. If you want to take responsibility for your life, you must choose one of those three options, and you must choose now. Then accept the consequences. No excuses. No negativity. No psychic pollution. Keep your inner space clear. "- ET
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Post by zendancer on Feb 9, 2011 22:34:24 GMT -5
I have found that when I am facing a big decision it is wise to honestly look within and ask yourself a simple question such as "is this person right for me?" and surely enough your inner tuition will tell you like it is. By the way zendancer are there any tips on how one could learn to listen to the small-still voice within. I have repeatedly tried to listen but all I hear is body sensations and energy flows deepening and moving....maybe I am just getting tired. Mits: It is not so much listening as it is becoming empty and open. One can simply sit down and become silent and attentive, or watch one's breathing, or feel one's breathing, or listen, or look at one's hands, or anything else in which nothing is expected. One ignores extraneous thoughts and simply waits for the truth to appear. The body/mind already understands the question, so there is no need to do anything but become silent and attentive. As TRF noted, the answer may appear within an hour, or it may take several days. Sometimes the answer may manifest in a strange way, but it when it appears, it will be unquestionably obvious. I had a friend who once faced a big life question, and he set off walking down some railroad tracks and contemplating the issue. He decided to walk in silence however long it might take until he knew what to do. After several miles, a huge hawk suddenly landed on a tree beside the tracks and stared at him. After he walked another hundred yards, the bird flew ahead of him and landed on another tree and kept staring at him. This sequence was repeated many times and went on way too long for him to think that it was anything normal. After a while the bird did something unusual and his question was resolved. He told me that after that experience he finally understood what American Indians called "a vision quest." I once had a major conflict arise that prompted me to go sit in a chair and contemplate the issue. I, too, was willing to sit however long it might take for an answer to appear. After five hours of silent sitting, an image from a movie appeared in my mind and my question was answered with crystal clear clarity. There was no doubt whatsoever about what I should do. After this sort of thing happens to someone once or twice, one learns that the universe can always be trusted to deliver the goods.
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Post by sharon on Feb 10, 2011 5:59:01 GMT -5
On the first reading of this, waves of energy or ripples set alight, inside the right hemisphere of me brain ~ The fact that they moved downwards is a rich contrast to the alternative direction of energy moving up and outwards ...
On a re-read, attention is centered in the upper chest area ~ and the beauty in the story is seen clearly, making me smile ~ the heart expands, glowing gently and the face chuckles while me left foot taps out ...
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astarxy
Junior Member
Live and let live
Posts: 54
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Post by astarxy on Feb 12, 2011 16:06:28 GMT -5
hey all, just a pit stop to say i'm enjoying reading all replies on this post. Zendancer's Vision Quest made me think of my experiences... there are always messages that lead you, just be acceptable to them. and one more thing perhaps... letting go what's unnecessary, leaving what's natural to stay and the feeling of spaceness... priceless. brg
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