Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 18, 2019 15:45:52 GMT -5
One often reads things about focusing on the I-Am, or on some subjective essence of consciousness. Sometimes I'll try to do that, and it's elusive. Then I think, well, if I can't find a core I-Am or essence, maybe I can look closely at something - anything - in the field of consciousness, to get a closer look at it. It seems like I can't do that either. Pick a perception, like the feeling of a part of the body - and that experience (or object of consciousness) seems to flicker and move. I wonder if that is because my decayed brain/mind has lost the ability to steadily hold an object of attention. Or if it's always been like that, and that object/experience/stuff in consciousness is always moving, jumping, flickering. That might even make sense biologically, if these experiences mysteriously correlate to the firing of nerve cells (I don't know if they do). Anyway, noticing this makes me think it would be refreshing to find something that doesn't do that, something that is STILL.
|
|
|
Post by stardustpilgrim on Aug 18, 2019 16:25:33 GMT -5
One often reads things about focusing on the I-Am, or on some subjective essence of consciousness. Sometimes I'll try to do that, and it's elusive. Then I think, well, if I can't find a core I-Am or essence, maybe I can look closely at some thing - anything - in the field of consciousness, to get a closer look at it. It seems like I can't do that either. Pick a perception, like the feeling of a part of the body - and that experience (or object of consciousness) seems to flicker and move. I wonder if that is because my decayed brain/mind has lost the ability to steadily hold an object of attention. Or if it's always been like that, and that object/experience/stuff in consciousness is always moving, jumping, flickering. That might even make sense biologically, if these experiences mysteriously correlate to the firing of nerve cells (I don't know if they do). Anyway, noticing this makes me think it would be refreshing to find something that doesn't do that, something that is STILL. This just means you are honestly and sincerely making a good effort, and seeing what's simple doesn't mean it's easy. Not many people get to where you are. It never gets easier, at least not for a very long time, but the time between efforts can get shorter. Correct effort is illusive. Mechanical efforts are easy. Conscious efforts are not.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 19, 2019 11:15:07 GMT -5
One often reads things about focusing on the I-Am, or on some subjective essence of consciousness. Sometimes I'll try to do that, and it's elusive. Then I think, well, if I can't find a core I-Am or essence, maybe I can look closely at some thing - anything - in the field of consciousness, to get a closer look at it. It seems like I can't do that either. Pick a perception, like the feeling of a part of the body - and that experience (or object of consciousness) seems to flicker and move. I wonder if that is because my decayed brain/mind has lost the ability to steadily hold an object of attention. Or if it's always been like that, and that object/experience/stuff in consciousness is always moving, jumping, flickering. That might even make sense biologically, if these experiences mysteriously correlate to the firing of nerve cells (I don't know if they do). Anyway, noticing this makes me think it would be refreshing to find something that doesn't do that, something that is STILL. This is from Godman's book. "Be As You Are" quoting a dialog with Ramana. "Q: What is the use of samadhi and does thought subsist then? A: Samadhi alone can reveal the truth. Thoughts cast a veil over reality, and so it is not realized as such in states other than samadhi. In samadhi there is only the feeling ‘I am’ and no thoughts. The experience of ‘I am’ is ‘being still’. " Hope this helps.
|
|
|
Post by stardustpilgrim on Aug 19, 2019 16:14:30 GMT -5
One often reads things about focusing on the I-Am, or on some subjective essence of consciousness. Sometimes I'll try to do that, and it's elusive. Then I think, well, if I can't find a core I-Am or essence, maybe I can look closely at some thing - anything - in the field of consciousness, to get a closer look at it. It seems like I can't do that either. Pick a perception, like the feeling of a part of the body - and that experience (or object of consciousness) seems to flicker and move. I wonder if that is because my decayed brain/mind has lost the ability to steadily hold an object of attention. Or if it's always been like that, and that object/experience/stuff in consciousness is always moving, jumping, flickering. That might even make sense biologically, if these experiences mysteriously correlate to the firing of nerve cells (I don't know if they do). Anyway, noticing this makes me think it would be refreshing to find something that doesn't do that, something that is STILL. A baby is pure awareness, he or she can't do anything, think anything, except be aware. There is no obstruction between awareness and whatever is in the field of the baby's senses. A baby is it's awareness. Now skip ahead 5, 6, 7 years and on to adulthood. The person has acquired hundreds of thousands of bits of memory. It is now the "job" of each bit of memory to jump into center stage and capture attention. Each bit of memory tries to make a claim as "I". This is what you are experiencing, "always moving, jumping, flickering". The bits of memory, "that object/experience/stuff in consciousness" lay claim to "I", and ATST attract in-the-world and are attracted-to that which corresponds to itself. This is just the ways thing are, and are with almost everyone. (The psychology of it all can get quite complex, sometimes we reject/hate what we don't know that we are as psychological contents/memory. But in that rejection/hate we are, even so, linked to it. The point is all of this can eventually be seen, and dismissed). The way is to ~ become again~ that pure unobstructed awareness. This is the meaning of zazeniac's full quote. Just recognize that any *method* you encounter has to be ~ outside~ the field of the contents of the neural structure. If it isn't, it's just a means for the little s self (the object/experience/stuff in consciousness) to maintain control. The following is a kind-of-the Ramana quote ('I am' is 'being still') on training wheels/keeping simple (bearing in mind what's written above). There is almost always tension in the face. When you wish to try to be still, notice tension in the face and relax it. Keep coming back to that. Eventually you can shift-to/become "baby awareness"/core I-AM or essence. You do not have a "decayed mind/brain".
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 20, 2019 1:53:57 GMT -5
... and ATST attract in-the-world and are attracted-to that which What does ATST stand for? Interesting synchronicity that you use this example. I've been noticing face tension recently. Anyway, thank you both for the comments.
|
|
|
Post by stardustpilgrim on Aug 20, 2019 6:20:37 GMT -5
... and ATST attract in-the-world and are attracted-to that which What does ATST stand for? Interesting synchronicity that you use this example. I've been noticing face tension recently. Anyway, thank you both for the comments. Hey robertk...ATST, at the same time. Cool synchronicity. Sure.
|
|
|
Post by zendancer on Aug 20, 2019 7:36:58 GMT -5
One often reads things about focusing on the I-Am, or on some subjective essence of consciousness. Sometimes I'll try to do that, and it's elusive. Then I think, well, if I can't find a core I-Am or essence, maybe I can look closely at some thing - anything - in the field of consciousness, to get a closer look at it. It seems like I can't do that either. Pick a perception, like the feeling of a part of the body - and that experience (or object of consciousness) seems to flicker and move. I wonder if that is because my decayed brain/mind has lost the ability to steadily hold an object of attention. Or if it's always been like that, and that object/experience/stuff in consciousness is always moving, jumping, flickering. That might even make sense biologically, if these experiences mysteriously correlate to the firing of nerve cells (I don't know if they do). Anyway, noticing this makes me think it would be refreshing to find something that doesn't do that, something that is STILL. Robert, there are many ways to discover what is always still and always here and now. Some people do it through inquiry, some people do it through samadhi, some people do it through various forms of meditation, and some people discover it by not doing anything at all. Each human is unique. The best that one can do is look where various sages are pointing, decide which approach one resonates with the most, and pursue that approach. Most people find the truth by becoming relatively silent. This is because thoughts obscure the obvious, so when the mind becomes relatively silent, realizations occur. Realizations inform mind, and clarity ensues (either gradually or all at once). A good example of the inquiry approach is Norio Kushi. Either read his book "Awake at the Wheel" or watch his video on batgap.com A good example of someone who didn't do anything is Paul Morgan-Somers. You can listen to his story on youtube There are dozens of examples of people who used meditation as their approach, and you can find them on both batgap and youtube If looking at the world seems unstable, then you might close your eyes and listen to "universal sound." It's always present in the background and always steady, and some people have awakened to the truth just listening to that sound. Or, if that doesn't appeal to you, close your eyes and listen to whatever physical sounds can be heard. I used to fall into samadhi listening to the hissing sound of a set of gas logs in a fireplace. Any sound can be used as an entry point. Learn about the various pathways, and then trust yourself in picking the best pathway for you.
|
|
|
Post by enigma on Aug 20, 2019 10:23:24 GMT -5
One often reads things about focusing on the I-Am, or on some subjective essence of consciousness. Sometimes I'll try to do that, and it's elusive. Then I think, well, if I can't find a core I-Am or essence, maybe I can look closely at some thing - anything - in the field of consciousness, to get a closer look at it. It seems like I can't do that either. Pick a perception, like the feeling of a part of the body - and that experience (or object of consciousness) seems to flicker and move. I wonder if that is because my decayed brain/mind has lost the ability to steadily hold an object of attention. Or if it's always been like that, and that object/experience/stuff in consciousness is always moving, jumping, flickering. That might even make sense biologically, if these experiences mysteriously correlate to the firing of nerve cells (I don't know if they do). Anyway, noticing this makes me think it would be refreshing to find something that doesn't do that, something that is STILL. The simple awareness of things jumping and flickering doesn't jump at all. The knowledge that you are here, that you exist, is present every waking moment without fail. That's your 'essence', and it couldn't be more obvious or more still.
|
|
|
Post by enigma on Aug 20, 2019 10:29:43 GMT -5
One often reads things about focusing on the I-Am, or on some subjective essence of consciousness. Sometimes I'll try to do that, and it's elusive. Then I think, well, if I can't find a core I-Am or essence, maybe I can look closely at some thing - anything - in the field of consciousness, to get a closer look at it. It seems like I can't do that either. Pick a perception, like the feeling of a part of the body - and that experience (or object of consciousness) seems to flicker and move. I wonder if that is because my decayed brain/mind has lost the ability to steadily hold an object of attention. Or if it's always been like that, and that object/experience/stuff in consciousness is always moving, jumping, flickering. That might even make sense biologically, if these experiences mysteriously correlate to the firing of nerve cells (I don't know if they do). Anyway, noticing this makes me think it would be refreshing to find something that doesn't do that, something that is STILL. This just means you are honestly and sincerely making a good effort, and seeing what's simple doesn't mean it's easy. Not many people get to where you are. It never gets easier, at least not for a very long time, but the time between efforts can get shorter. Correct effort is illusive. Mechanical efforts are easy. Conscious efforts are not. The effort is ultimately seen to be unnecessary, because what is being striven for is too close, too obvious. The only point of the effort is to reveal that there is no point to it.
|
|
|
Post by satchitananda on Aug 20, 2019 11:00:24 GMT -5
Pick a perception, like the feeling of a part of the body - and that experience (or object of consciousness) seems to flicker and move. I wonder if that is because my decayed brain/mind has lost the ability to steadily hold an object of attention. Or if it's always been like that, and that object/experience/stuff in consciousness is always moving, jumping, flickering. The stillness is behind, prior to or transcendent of that which is flickering. If you just let go of that which you want to remain still there will be stillness itself. The point of being attentive to I is for it to disappear and dissolve into the source. It should be flickering until it is finally extinguished.
|
|
Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
|
Post by Deleted on Aug 20, 2019 14:30:00 GMT -5
Pick a perception, like the feeling of a part of the body - and that experience (or object of consciousness) seems to flicker and move. I wonder if that is because my decayed brain/mind has lost the ability to steadily hold an object of attention. Or if it's always been like that, and that object/experience/stuff in consciousness is always moving, jumping, flickering. The stillness is behind, prior to or transcendent of that which is flickering. If you just let go of that which you want to remain still there will be stillness itself. The point of being attentive to I is for it to disappear and dissolve into the source. It should be flickering until it is finally extinguished. Or, in other words, Being is the ground to that which arises ephemerally, transiently.
|
|